"Babylon A.D." a Dullard

There's a point in filmmaking that a movie's so bad that even the filmmaker's diss the snot out of it, then you're in for a real bomb. In a recent interview, Mathieu Kassovitz, director of this wretched box of ditritus, aka Babylon A.D., stated that he hated the way the film turned out, due to the studio's constant cutting and re-cutting of the film. He also hated how it didn't get envisioned the way he wanted the Maurice G. Dantec novel to be. Vin Diesel even joked, asking if he was still even in the movie, due to the constant cutting of the film. In the end, it's a waste.

Diesel returns to action status (or lack thereof) in this tepid, futuristic action-drama, playing a mercenary named Toorop, whose is hired to escort a woman, who's carrying an organism that bears the coming of two Messiahs. Toorop, along with the woman's nun guardian (Michelle Yeoh), must protect her from a cult that's attempting to harvest this organism. They trek from Russia to New York City, battling evildoers every step of the way. Essentially, this is basically a futuristic version of The Nativity Story.

The futuristic set pieces are nice, especially when they hit New York. However, it seems like it should be in a completely different film. Everything else about this movie is bad. The dialogue is awful, Diesel monologues a lot, the action is flat and unexciting, and above and beyond all, it's just plain boring. Diesel does what he can with this, but Yeoh is completely wasted. I'd be blown away if people stayed in their seats, rather than jumping out of them to get to the exit. The A.D. in the title must stand for "Another Dud."

1 1/2 stars